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Winter 07

Starman Matt

“Bastard of the Quarter, what the hell is that?”

I know this is what you are asking yourself, since it is supposed to be Bastard of the Month. I decided to go ahead and do it this way instead of once a month because almost all of my lovely Bastards have, up to this point, gotten the Bastard of the Month. It is most interesting to think about which one I will give it to when I am running out of options and then they whine and complain about it no matter what. Thus, Bastard of the Quarter was born. This is easier for all of us to keep up, especially me. And then this way, they have to work harder and be better little Bastards in order to be considered. LOL. I know that is just wrong. Would it be me though, if I didn’t do it this way??? I think not… :)

Well for this new award there was one person that immediately popped into my head, and that person is Starman Matt. Starman has been with the Bastards for a long time, and well before he was on cast he helped us out with all kinds of stuff. Starman puts in endless hours finding stuff for us online, and spreading the word and work of Bastard-dom all over the globe. He has these endless find-anything internet skills which I cannot begin to understand (Librarian Powers ACTIVATE!!!) and posts on thousands of logs, blogs, and internet sites to spread the word of RHPS and the Bastards. He flyers everywhere he goes, always finds new ways to bring people to the show, and makes new flyers for us (I really love them because they are all sarcastic).

He is also the person responsible for most of our Virgin prizes, which as all of you know, can be quite entertaining. He always has input as far as new shows, ideas, or places to advertise go, and lets us know when the Rocky related events are coming up. He is never late, and doesn’t call in sick all the freaking time, or whine about things (even when he has to be at work at 8 a.m. and it is 3 a.m.), is always tip-top and ready for Pre-Show, and doesn’t miss a beat telling people about the show to get them there.

He spends countless hours on the website changing and adding stuff, and even more time filming and posting all the Bastard videos. Those are all his, kids, so next time, thank him for the time he spends on that. His theme show costumes are awesome (think Dr. Who and Jabba the Hut, among many others) and always make me smile. As head Floorwalker, I need him on Floorwalking more so you don’t usually see him onstage that much, but when you do, enjoy it. He has this nonchalant “I really don’t care” attitude as Riff, and is the official “nervous” Dr. Scott, and always nails the lines as a grim and dark-browed Crimmie. He doesn’t play Brad anymore, but when he did, he was great at it. Maybe I can get him to do it again someday. :)

All in all, Starman is a great representation of what a dedicated cast member should be. He has charm, wit, and just a bit of a mean streak in him that pulls the people in. His speech is eloquent when need be, and he can put things into words everyone can understand (yay me being retarded sometimes!). He has many fine qualities and attributes of esteem (yea I totally went there!) that help to hold up LB, and I am so very proud to call him a Bastard!


  • Winter 07 Starman Matt
  • November 07 Tora
  • October 07 Jennnnnnn
  • September 07 Josh
  • August 07 Squiddie
  • July 07 Charles
  • June 07 Wolf
  • May 07 Wes
  • April 07 Cody
  • March 07 Halo
  • February 07 Emily
  • January 07 Mike
  • December 06 The Globe
  • November 06 Ammanda
  • October 06 Mr. Saturn
  • September 06 Limey
  • August 06 Kate
  • July 06 Robert
  • June 06 Danny
  • May 06 Katie
  • April 06 English
  • March 06 Fred



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